blast from the past

I got this list of horrifying facts (the only consolation I can find is that obviously many others did these same exact things) in an e-mail entitled "If You Were A Girl in the 70s." Enjoy cringing.

• You owned a bicycle with a banana seat and a plastic basket with flowers on it. That's so eerily true.
• You learned to skate with actual skates (not roller blades) that had metal wheels. I had both the normal (safe) kind that were like boots and the Death in the Afternoon version that shakily buckled onto my shoes.
• You thought Gopher from Love Boat was cute. Sigh, Fred Grandy.
• You had either a "bowl cut" or "pixie" or the "Dorothy Hamill." People sometimes thought you were a boy. And I bought the Short & Sassy shampoo to go with it
• You owned "Klick-Klacks" and smacked yourself in the face more than once! They totally rocked; I wish I still had them.
• You wore a poncho, gauchos, and knickers. Possibly all in the same day.
• You begged Santa for the electronic game Simon. And I got it! Then mastered it! What?
• You spent hours in your backyard on your metal swing set with the trapeze. The swing set tipped over at least once. Emphasis on the "at least."
• You had a pair of Doctor Scholl's sandals (the ones with hard sole & the buckle). Ugh. And I wasn't even forced to get them.
• You wanted your first kiss to be at a roller rink! Alas, it was not. But I was awesome at skating backwards, just in case.
• Your hairstyle was described as having "wings" or "feathers" and you kept it pretty with the comb in your back pocket. I clearly remember my little pink plastic Goody. Good times.
• You know who Strawberry Shortcake is, as well as her friends, Blueberry Muffin and Huckleberry Pie. And their nemesis the evil Purple Pie Man! Which is pretty creepy when you think about it - was he trying to PUT THEM IN PIES?
• You tried to do lots of arts and crafts, like yarn and Popsicle-stick God's eyes, decoupage, or those weird pot holders made on a plastic loom. Um, that would be the Loom Looper, people. And my grandma LOVED her pot holders.
• You made Shrinky-Dinks and put iron-on kittens on your t-shirts. Then I ironed my name in felt letters on the back of the t-shirts...
• You used to tape record songs off the radio (or tv) by holding your portable tape player up to the speaker. See these posts for documentation.
• You had subscriptions to "Dynamite" and "Tiger Beat." How else would I have covered every square inch of wall space in my bedroom?
• You wore friendship pins on your tennis shoes, or shoelaces with heart or rainbow designs. How about all of the above?
• You wanted to be a Solid Gold dancer. Desperately.
• You glopped your lips in Strawberry Roll-on lip-gloss till it almost dripped off. That was in preparation for the first kiss at the roller rink. Duh.

What is surprisingly missing: Smurfs, Happy Days, having a crush on Barbarino from Welcome Back, Kotter, my first album ("Thriller"), Hello Kitty everything, dressing like Cyndi Lauper, rainbow suspenders a la Mork from Ork (not to mention saying "Nanu Nanu" to my friends and laughing uproariously), shamelessly 'smoking' candy cigarettes, movies with intermissions (and drive-in theaters), playing marbles & jacks, and sliding across the slick vinyl backseat of my parents' car because seatbelts were not required. Ah, youth.

I'm breaking the law and posting this as my Thursday Thirteen anyway (it's only six off...).

Go see others here.

it's all about meme

Thanks to my good friend Lisa, I have something to talk about today. Because frequently, I'm pretty quiet & shy...

This is the "Random/Weird Things About Yourself" meme. I've kinda been doing this all along, I think, but I'll be more specific for the purposes of this game. Enjoy.
_____________________________________
First the rules:
*Link to the person(s) who tagged you and post the rules on your blog check
*Share 7 random/weird things about yourself will do
*Tag 7 people at the end of your post and include links to their sites do I know 7 people with blogs??
*Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog got it

1. I worked for two years at a drive-up fast food place called Kow Korner - but that's not the weird part. I had to wear a cowboy hat & bolo tie - also not the weird part. I cried when it closed & was torn down, and still avoid the street it was on in my home town; if we have to drive by there, I look away.
2. I used to make up secret routines for songs ("Leader of the Pack" was my best number) and lip sync in front of my vanity mirror. For hours.
3. I've written two e-mails to Fountains of Wayne. No response. Surprisingly.
4. I smell things, a lot. Usually food & drink; I like to think I have a heightened awareness of what may or may not be poisonous. If you asked my best friend in college, she would remember me once sniffing a cow magnet. Something about it made me think it would smell like licorice (it didn't).
5. I thoroughly enjoyed making up voices when reading the Harry Potter books. I just didn't realize in book 1 that Hagrid would be such a prominent character...
6. When cooking or baking, I clean as I go. Obsessively.
7. Sometimes I will 'air type' things people are saying around me. I started doing it in high school to practice my typing skills; now it just qualifies as a weird habit.

I will tag Elaine at Blog in My Eye and Katydidnot and Suz at The World According to her... And anyone else who wants to, jump in and get weird.

still lazy, times two

Two names you go by:

1. Mom
2. Mrs. Spencer

Two things you are wearing right now:

1. candy cane striped pajamas
2. WSU fleecy slippers

Two of your favorite things to do:

1. read
2. watch movies

(I know; *snore*)

Two things you want very badly at the moment:

1. Krispy Kreme donut (or 4)
2. sleep

Two favorite pets you have had/have:

1. Sally, our Beagle/practice child
2. Rosebud, our Bassett Hound/practice 2nd child

Two things you did last night:

1. Took the kids Trick-or-Treating at Hewlett-Packard (it was allowed, we didn't crash the place)
2. Watched "The Painted Veil" (and subsequently had fantastic Edward Norton-laden dreams)

Two things you ate today:

1. Sweet potato fries from Burgerville
2. Multiple Halloween-sized chocolate candy bars

Two people you last talked to:

1. Stu; it went something like this: "Stop groping me." "Oh, my hand slipped."
2. Kids as a unit: "GoodnightLoveyouSeeyouinthemorning"

Two things you're doing tomorrow:

1. Giving out costume awards at the Boy Scouts Space Derby
2. Dressing like a cowgirl at our church's Wild West carnival

Two longest trips taken:

1. Ten days divided between Singapore, Penang, Guangzhou, & Shanghai
2. Any of our summer driving vacations from Washington State to Texas, via every other state in the union

Two favorite holidays:

1. Christmas
2. my birthday (yes it is)

Two more people who will fill this out:

1. MamaMilton (please, even though you've endured a medical procedure and various PTA activities this week)
2. Katydidnot (please, even though you narrowly escaped having your house burn down and your ex-mother-in-law is visiting this week)

Two words to my readers:

1. Thank
2. You

i know you envy & idolize me - i'm purple!

You Are a Purple Crayon

Your world is colored in dreamy, divine, and classy colors.You hold yourself to a sky high standard, and you are always graceful.People envy, idolize, and copy you without realizing it. You are an icon for those who know you.And while it is hard to be a perfectionist, rest assured it's paying off! Your color wheel opposite is yellow. While yellow people may be wise, they lack the manners and class needed to impress you.

What color crayon are you?

things that are funny

According to me, though I am not a clown, here to amuse you...

• students who think teachers can't hear them talk about outrageously inappropriate behaviors
• t-shirt seen on customer at wild oats: "MEAT IS MURDER tasty, tasty murder"
• the words 'penis,' 'fraggle,' 'wormy,' and 'poop'
• grown men who still go by the name Scooter (this could also be on the 'things that are sad' list, I suppose)
• bumper sticker: "Jesus Loves You...Everyone Else Thinks You're an Asshole"
• www.askaninja.com
• best riddle ever: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead (and the question that is always in the back of my mind: Do monkeys really die in & fall out of trees? Curious...)
• best knock-knock joke: Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Inter- MOO!

Now, go forth and chuckle in my name.

things that are sad

Only a random sampling, in no particular order (other than stream of consciousness, of course)

• family photos left in frames donated to goodwill
• the disturbing bunching that occurs with misfitting sweatpants
• a bumper sticker that says "I Brake for Birds" (My proposed counter-sticker: "If I Rear End You Because You're Braking for Birds, I Will Lose My Mind in Your Face")
• small children being dragged through the grocery store at 9 pm
• parents yelling at small children as they drag them through the grocery store at 9 pm
• yelling parents of small children in the grocery store filling their carts with crap that will eventually turn them into parents who yell at their small children in the store, late at night
• a surprised student who said to me when I informed him of the D he was getting in Speech, "but shouldn't I at least have a C because I'm in class everyday?"
• that student's mother is a teacher
• all of the 'reality' shows (I think they're satellite feeds from a different hostile universe, actually) featuring people trying to date or perform jobs
• me not being able to stop watching those shows if they appear on my TV screen

Tune in later for 'things that are funny.' It's like Prozac on the page!